15 Lessons for Young Men: Unite Dream and Day (Lesson 12)

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The young man showered himself with the ladies daily. Oh, how sweet this life seemed! But how sour its effects were! He felt hollow… as if he wasn’t true to something. And then, a Voice swelled up inside him.

VOICE: “Pestilence! You cannot keep me caged forever!”

“What are you, cruel voice? Your words are like daggers in my heart.”

VOICE: “Then you are not valiant, for you fear the pointed tip like a soft worm. I am you, your inner self, your own imagination, and… if you like… soul. By caging me, your successes with women will spike with increasing frustration.”

“What! You are the one that is spreading this EMPTINESS through my body like a virus?”

VOICE: “You craven dismal-dreaming miscreant! You know you are now getting what you desired: women. So why are you so unhappy?”

“Oh Voice, most cruel and foul. You are the rudeliest welcome to this world. My answer is, because I haven’t found the right one…”

VOICE: No, you wimpled beef-witted wagtail! You have divided your emotions from yourself, your imagination from reality, your true personality from the universe.

“But I had to change because I wasn’t getting the women!”

VOICE: “And you failed because by keeping me caged, you limit yourself.”

“I act only in accordance to what women want.”

VOICE: But women want you to live in your own world, to stop bending over to be spanked (and not in the good way), a willy billy translating into a tampon that every woman uses for her needs (emotional, physical, social, etc.). You are the equivalent of the woman doing whatever to please the men. Yes, the girl that is the smokehouse where every man does place his meat. You are the Magical Tampon where every woman does place in her…”

“Oh you are a crusty botch of Nature!”

“All the things women want… confidence… humor… spontaneous… fun… These are all qualities of a MAN living out his imagination. Embrace your dreams! Stop trying to be ‘perfect’ in woman’s eyes for you’ll wrong the truest commandment with sexuality: Do not bore women. And…”

“Unite Dream and Day”

“Goodly youth, you have gotten a letter.”

The youth was excited. “A letter? For ME?” He hurried to rip it open. “Who is it from?”

“Read.”

And the youth did. He looked at Pook. “The address says the letter came from Womaniverse!”

“Indeed! Like a heaven over us, the ladies in Womaniverse watch us over. Yes, they always notice you. They look at your life and reward the men of the world with the feminine element.”

“But not all men get the same type?”

“Oh, no! Some get virgin material while the fools get common ore.”

“What else can you tell me of this ‘feminine element’?”

“It is highly relaxing, very ornamental in sports cars, explodes and freezes for no reason, and reacts well to gold, platinum, or any of the precious metals. It also turns green when placed near superior specimens.”

“What are you saying, Pook? That how we are the rock in their world, that they are the rock, an element of ballast for us in this universe?”

“Oh, silly youth! These thoughts are too feathery and fluff at nothingness in your dimension. Don’t think of it, only read the letter.”

“Do the women write to us men, often?”

“Rarely. Usually, women speak in womanese so we men don’t hear anything anyway. But, being a dutiful Pook, an emissary myself, I have translated the letter to masculine terms.”

“Thank heavens! Now I see why it’s in 19th century style!”

“Just read the letter.”

The youth held up the letter and read.

“Oh, Pook! How strange these women be!”

“Indeed! One of the biggest surprises of my transformations into Don Juan was not that the older women noticing the difference, no, it was that they said, ‘It is like you have grown up.’”

“Why did they say that, Pook?”

“Because it was the truth. Why do you let people mold and shape your life? Your life is going in circles because you cannot tear yourself from your loser friends or stupid entertainment. Keep reading the letter.”

The youth put down the letter. “How odd and strange this note is!”

Pook smiled. “If one day, you actually get the chance to enter Womaniverse, you’ll be even more amazed.”

“And the key to get to Womaniverse?”

“…is to unite your Dream and Day. It is the only way.”

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